I am going to admit something here. I don’t like to use the term “self care”. I have no issue with others using it. But when I say it, or read where I have written it in past blog posts, well I feel really funny. Uncomfortable. I feel fake. I don’t feel like it holds enough weight or meaning to how I really feel about “taking care of myself”.
Who am I to ignore myself? That inner, deep down self? Who am I to hide the real me, and show the world someone I am not, or just a tiny part of me? Why would I think that others want me to pretend to be someone I am not? Why wouldn’t they want to meet and know the real me?
I run out of energy so easily. I am an introvert, so I need alone time to recharge, recalibrate. The world drains me.
My flavour of introversion means I get particularly overwhelmed and drained if I need to organise systems and people. I used to hate the fact I would try and set up a routine and not be able to stick to it. I hate having commitments. It makes me feel trapped and held down. I like spaciousness and freedom to do what I feel like doing.